Dear Tate - 10 Months

Dear sweet bubba,

As I type this, we are in your room surrounded by a sea of books and toys you've been playing with all morning...but you're presently trying to hang from the end table next to me in an attempt to investigate what I'm doing. You're so curious and smart; you blow my mind every hour of every day. Beneath those expressive eyebrows (just like your mama's), behind your beautiful blue-blue eyes (just like your daddy's), I see you learning and understanding so much of the world already and it makes me so, so excited about what the future holds for you and us.

You are a very active little guy, never sitting still for long. You are kind of over crawling - something you perfected months ago - and are instead intent on walking around furniture and pulling yourself up on everything - even if it's a small toy on the floor. You constantly grab things off tables and open drawers to chew on the new things you find; you keep mama very busy! I'm sure you will be walking soon, so it might be time for me to shine up my running shoes!

You play well on your own -- chattering away the whole time -- and occasionally you will stop to take time to cuddle with me for a minute, which absolutely melts my heart. And although you are very independent for a little guy, if I leave you in a room by yourself for a minute, you holler in discontent or start spitting angrily like a camel (which is what you do when you're mad...it's quite hilarious, actually). The bond we have is so wonderful. And your dad? Well, he is the coolest, funniest person in the whole world as far as you're concerned, and I totally agree.

You are so easygoing and rarely cry, making it very easy for us to take you out and about. I find it almost embarrassing how far we can push you, be it past your bedtime or feeding schedule (not that we do this often - you eat and nurse on the go in the Ergo), before you will fuss. You also have a crazy high tolerance for pain; when you fall or bump your head on something, you just give a look like, "What was THAT all about?" and then get right back up with no tears. I hope these tendencies mean you are going to be a very adaptable person when you get older.

Oh, are you ever silly - we have so much fun! You love mimicking the things we do, putting toys on your head when daddy does, smacking your lips when I do, and playing chase & giggling with gusto when we catch you. You play peekaboo with blankets and stand on your head, and you recently started blowing kisses - a trick we didn't even teach you! When music comes on, you dance and wiggle your little behind in step with the beat. When I say "Cheeeeese!" you get the biggest cheesy grin on your face, showing all 6 of your cute teeth. You kiss yourself in the mirror with tongue, wave and high-five when prompted and also give zerberts/raspberries, after which point you will laugh and laugh over how clever you are.

I know I already said you are smart, but really... If you get your silly side from me, you get your smarts from your brilliant daddy. I'm almost afraid of the day you become smarter than me; what will I do then?  I recently took a baby sign-language class so we could better communicate with you. The other day as I was feeding you, you suddenly started doing the sign for 'milk' and I was blown away. How quickly you learn, my boy! You repeat words/sounds we say and are already up to five spoken words now: mama, dada, hi, bye and ball. When your daddy comes home from work at night you break out into a smile and breathlessly say, "Hi dada! Hi dada!" while waving at him. I think 'dog' might be your next word, because when you see Molly or Lucy, you excitedly say, "Deh! Deh!" 

Speaking of your pups, you love them so much and they love you in return, letting you crawl on and "pet" them (we are working on being gentle so you don't aggravate them too much). One rainy day about a month ago, I let the dogs in and you went over to Lucy and draped yourself over her. When I noticed you putting something in your mouth and then taking it out to look at, I went to investigate. What I found was a little shocking, my boy...it was a SLUG that my precious baby had just taken off the dog! Thank goodness bugs don't gross me out, because you are ALL BOY. I have a feeling this is just a sign of things to come.

We are in the midst of planning your first birthday party, something that took me a while to accept. How are you already over 10 months, TaterBug? I swear I was just dressing you in the long-sleeved kimono t-shirt we stole from the hospital (shhh...don't tell!), and now you are larger than life and well on your way to imprinting the world with your amazing gifts. The future is yours, Tate...I have no doubt you will shine.

I love you times a million and two,

xoxo Your proud mama

I Picked You Up and Everything Changed...

Today is my due date - the day I waited patiently and excitedly to come for almost ten months. I say almost because it turns out I didn't have to wait that long.  A week ago, on September 15, 2010 at 2:30am, my water broke in my sleep and what followed was the most amazing, emotionally and physically-enduring day of my life.  And at 10:45pm, my life changed forever when my beautiful boy took his first breath and took my breath away.  I'm so exceedingly proud to introduce you to him now!

~Tate Doty Burton~

Born Wednesday, Sept. 15, 2010 at 10:45pm

7lbs 2.4oz, 18.5 inches

and PERFECT

Tate is a very happy, content baby and Mark and I are having such an incredible time getting to know this little person we made with love.  We're not sure what we did to deserve him, but we sure are glad we did.  It's hard to imagine life without him; thank God we don't have to now.

This proud mama will be back with the birth story, the last belly pics, and photos of the nursery.  In the meantime, though, I'll be off enjoying every minute with my little man.  He makes me happier than I've ever been in my very happy life, and I don't want to miss a thing.  

Just Breathe

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine; You make me happy, when skies are gray; You'll never know dear, how much I love you; Please don't take my sunshine away...*

Lately I find myself having occasional visions of bad things that take me to a dark, fleeting place.  Like I will suddenly envision myself losing Chickpea late in pregnancy or having only a short while to spend with him/her before they are gone from our lives like a distant memory.  While I don't dwell on these morose thoughts, I must admit they cause me to pause and reflect a bit.

The reality is that jumping into 'parenthood' is by far the most simultaneously amazing yet terrifying thing a person could ever do.  My excitement far exceeds any fear - and always will, I hope - but when you think about it, a lot of blind faith must be employed during such a journey.  Mark and I have no control over what can, or will, happen, and when I allow myself to think about that too much, it's a little hard to breathe.  I already feel such a scary strong love for Chickpea; I know this love will only multiply times a million once s/he is here with us. 

The best thing I know how to do is enjoy and appreciate each moment as it comes.  This pregnancy has taught me that while things aren't always easy, they are often much more beautiful that way.  The twists, turns, and unknowns have a way of shaping a more wonderful story than one could have written on their own.  I have a feeling being a mom to Chickpea will be much the same way.

And so, my promise to myself as a mama is this: I will take things one day at a time, thank God for each day we are given, and never, ever take any of it for granted. No matter what may come, it will undoubtedly have been worth it.


*Growing up, my nickname was 'Sunshine' and my mom would sing this song to me.  It wasn't until much, much later in life that I realized how touching and somber the lyrics really are.  I guess you could say this song from my childhood perfectly reflects my feelings on the subject of this post.